A groomsman that plans the bucks night

Stripper? How about a magician instead! If you think the female anatomy is bedazzling, just wait til you see this card trick Faux-Houdini can perform. He’s impressive AND male. Did I mention women aren’t allowed at this bucks night? He can make an ‘adult toy’ disappear twice as quick as a stripper — he just throws it in the trash where it belongs. Ta-da!

Booze cruise? I recommend a peaceful gondola ride down the river. This is a perfect time for your fiance and his boys to reflect on the value of mateship, and bring the group closer together. No alcohol allowed as this is a safety hazard. And, with impaired judgment, how will they be able to paddle the boat? Don’t drink and drown, folks.

BBQ ribs and steak? No way. If there’s one thing I know, it’s that men love to mill about, eating cheese and assorted meat platters, and gossip about other people. Plus, BBQ sauce will stain your fiance’s crisp white shirt. Gross.

Drinking games? I have a game for you. It’s called: Talk extensively about what you love about me (the bride). The rules are: sit in a circle and take turns telling the groom why he’s lucky to have me (in this case, you) as his wife-to-be.

After the immense excitement of the magician, it’s about time they all head to bed. This party ends at 10pm, boys. You’ll arrive, lights will come on, and everyone will be instructed to leave. What did they think this was — a slumber party? They’ll thank you later when they wake up fresh as a daisy.